Confession
I don't know what I'm doing! There, I've said it. I have all these thoughts and theories on parenting, but they are just that - ideas, and not facts. In fact, I don't think that any of us Mommies really know what we're doing. Well, maybe that lady on TLC who has umpteen kids (but you don't want to live with her, because her sons are building their own house from 2x4s and their bare hands and they have to walk uphill to school both ways in the snow year round), but I have a sneaking suspicion that the rest of us are bluffing and feeling our way through parenthood, learning from one messy mistake at a time. If I'm lucky, you will need only minimal psycho-therapy as an adult.
I get the feeling that Mommies aren't supposed to admit they are fallible, because what kid in his right mind will obey and listen if he KNOWS his mommy is just a human? And the pressure is triple for adoptive Mommies, because we were entrusted with a child instead of just making one, which implies that we HAVE TO be better at this gig than the average mama. But I think it's important for you to know that I'm not perfect and don't claim to be, and I will do my best to apologize to you when I'm wrong. Like yesterday, when I was the world's worst crab. I'm sorry.
So there, neener-neener, I hopped off my pedestal before you could knock me off it! I win. The view's nicer from the floor anyhow, except for all this dog hair. Let's go build a block tower. Are the blocks age-appropriate/germ-free/made from recycled shoes? I have no idea. Will I perfect the correct ratio of helping you vs. letting you do things independently? Hmmm...probably not. But I'll let you knock the tower down when we're done.
Love, Mommy
Annie, I'll confess: 22 years of teaching and I also feel like I could write a dear King Noah letter with the same feelings. On my part I would probably add: will I be able to teach you that you can indeed express frustrations but will I bottle them up if I teach you that there are ways to do it that are certainly more acceptable than others?
ReplyDeleteIt felt so much easier with 25 kids in a classroom setting.