While I think the internet sometimes is a problem for us parents (way too much conflicting advice!), this is one case where it was a huge help. I located 2 cloth diaper companies, FuzziBunz and Green Acre Designs, that carry an XL. Then I went on diaperswappers armed with the right search terms and found 6 secondhand XL GADs, which are working great! Easy to put on and off my active boy, absorbent, cute, and comfy. That's our daytime solution for now.
Our nighttime salvation came from bedwetter pants. We tried both the Huggies Goodnites and the Pampers Underjams. They are pull-up style, slim-fitting, stretchy, and soft. Best of all, they hold a whole night's worth of liquid output, so the 5am wakeup calls are a thing of the past. Whew! Both brands seem to work equally well, so we'll probably just buy whatever is on sale that week. And I can get them discounted through Diapers.com OR find them at Target if I don't stay on top of my inventory. Whew! This means underpants are still optional - Hooray!