Alternative Pronunciations by Spork
Fuh-muh-mana Glass.....Magnifying Glass
Spork keeps us laughing....
While eating tacos, Spork declared, "Look, Mommy! I got some cheese felled down in my shirt!" (Pulls it out and eats it with gusto)
Spork: Daddy, did you check my pants for nuts?
Daddy: What?
S: I had walnuts in my pocket, I hope they didn’t go in the washer
Spork: I'm worried that Tater will be jealous that I'm wearin' sandals.
M: That's kind of you to think of her feelings.
S: I think I not gonna even tell her I'm wearin' sandals, then she won't feel bad.
M: Sounds like a plan, your feet will be under the table at the restaurant, so she probably won't notice.
(Tater and Daddy arrive. Spork and I are already seated. He begins to waver in his plan.)
S: Hi Tater! Guess what? My feet are feeling so cold, I can feel the breeze on my toes, I don't even know why.
M: (raised eyebrows at Spork)
S: Oh right! Never mind, never mind. Hey, I can't even believe I'm wearing something that used to be the Nugget's. I'm wearing them on my feet.
Tater: That's nice.
S: Don't look under the table, because you'll be jealous.
M: (face palm)
Tater - a future surgeon? D- for bedside manner.
T: Daddy, if you scraped this (mole) off, would there be a blood rainbow?
D: Huh?
T: A blood rainbow. Would the blood come out in the shape of a rainbow like this? (Gestures with hand, making an arc)
D: No, it would just bleed like the rest of your skin bleeds when you get hurt.
T: Oh (slight disappointment)
Tater talked Spork into helping her with some delicate head surgery on her stuffed dog Rosie.
T: You can be my assistant, but you have to wear gloves.
S: Ok! Got the gloves! Now what?
T: You hold her like this. She got shot, but I can make her better with this sharp needle. I can sew her up. Hmm, it doesn't look good. (Gets a piece of paper and a marker and traces a body outline of the poor dog.) I'm probably going to have to take off most of her head, but we'll fix it later.
(I'm getting her these syringe pens for the next gift-giving occasion.)
Fuh-muh-mana Glass.....Magnifying Glass
Spork keeps us laughing....
While eating tacos, Spork declared, "Look, Mommy! I got some cheese felled down in my shirt!" (Pulls it out and eats it with gusto)
Spork: Daddy, did you check my pants for nuts?
Daddy: What?
S: I had walnuts in my pocket, I hope they didn’t go in the washer
Spork: I'm worried that Tater will be jealous that I'm wearin' sandals.
M: That's kind of you to think of her feelings.
S: I think I not gonna even tell her I'm wearin' sandals, then she won't feel bad.
M: Sounds like a plan, your feet will be under the table at the restaurant, so she probably won't notice.
(Tater and Daddy arrive. Spork and I are already seated. He begins to waver in his plan.)
S: Hi Tater! Guess what? My feet are feeling so cold, I can feel the breeze on my toes, I don't even know why.
M: (raised eyebrows at Spork)
S: Oh right! Never mind, never mind. Hey, I can't even believe I'm wearing something that used to be the Nugget's. I'm wearing them on my feet.
Tater: That's nice.
S: Don't look under the table, because you'll be jealous.
M: (face palm)
Tater - a future surgeon? D- for bedside manner.
T: Daddy, if you scraped this (mole) off, would there be a blood rainbow?
D: Huh?
T: A blood rainbow. Would the blood come out in the shape of a rainbow like this? (Gestures with hand, making an arc)
D: No, it would just bleed like the rest of your skin bleeds when you get hurt.
T: Oh (slight disappointment)
Tater talked Spork into helping her with some delicate head surgery on her stuffed dog Rosie.
T: You can be my assistant, but you have to wear gloves.
S: Ok! Got the gloves! Now what?
T: You hold her like this. She got shot, but I can make her better with this sharp needle. I can sew her up. Hmm, it doesn't look good. (Gets a piece of paper and a marker and traces a body outline of the poor dog.) I'm probably going to have to take off most of her head, but we'll fix it later.
(I'm getting her these syringe pens for the next gift-giving occasion.)
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